Where to go?

Where to go?

It is hard now, our economy is diminishing, contracts are few and far between giving a feast or famine future and local prospects just don't recognize an entrepreneurial spirit.

I have been contracting as a web designer, since early 2000 and have been reassessing and shifting to freelance photography and even to shooting video trying to build my skills in a diversified manner that marks me as "indispensable" to future patrons. But the truth is, I am just a clone of all the other "hopefuls" that are doing the exact same thing.

The reality is, while knowledge of computers and enthusiasm for writing and creating videos are fun to do. They tend to leave one standing beside themselves.

While I have had dreams of working for Google and Apple, even to the extent of bettering my odds by actively promoting Google's technology with the gPhone and proudly attended the Apple's Developers Conference. Not a single offer has come to my table. Oh I get recruiters calling me to no end, promising me the moon and all the cheese it is made of but as the date progresses I am just another name and number for their little black book and I don't even know how many stars they give me.

So, I stick to my freelancer ways, insisting to contract out my professional services as opposed to delude myself into thinking that a job will really give me security, not that I believe that any corporation could truly provide anything more stable than I could.

True to my nature I find it hard to work for people than to work with them for a mutual business advantage. To be an employee seems to be a joke, not because I am adverse to working as a team or to work for a greater common goal of fiscal success, far from it. The frustrations of dealing with the politics of nepotism and playing favorites to under-qualified "buddies" of the manager is a constant theme of working a regular job, with regular people as opposed to an interesting gig that will allow for more dynamic possibilities.

All things being equal, I must confess hindsight being 20/20 I do not feel that my focus in freelancing endeavors are a waste of time or my resources. To be honest, I don't think I would of been introduced to the variety of opportunities (even if those opportunities did not land anything or go the direction I had hoped for). But that is just me.

So, would I ever consider conventional employment? Well, as strange as this may sound I do not see the distinction between a full time job or a contract that requires my full time attentions. The legal world seems to create a artificial circumstance for a full-time employee, a W2 employee seems to be more controlled and dummied down control of creativity and time (punch in the time clock, do work, clock out for lunch, eat lunch, clock back in for lunch, do more work, clock out).

As a contractor you have more control over this time to use it creatively and more efficiently and here in lies the problem as described to me by the CEO of Javaground:

I was interviewing with the CEO who explicitly told me that he would never consider incorporating me into his company as a contractor for the main reason that he could not have complete control over me. As an employee he could better have control over me and my loyalties would be more to his company and not my own consultancy.

I protested and told him that as a consultant, contractor he would have access to my entire professional network and as far as my loyalties to his company, Non Disclosure Agreements would legally prohibit me from playing the field and compromising secrets of his company. He still wanted me to be a regular employee, he still wanted that illusionary control over my time and loyalties. To my perception as a contractor/consultant the demand on my time and the loyalties to my new patron would be no different than being a regular full time employee.

My rational words fell on deaf ears, he didn't care, he wanted an employee and I wanted a business partner and I politely disengaged from further negotiations on the subject and consequently did not receive an offer to work for his company.

It would of been a cool company to work for, but in retrospect I am glad he never followed up with me. In my eyes if he was honestly that adamant over the semantics of my professional relation to him and his company then we probably would not of been able to work well with each other in the first place.

So, Where to go? Is probably not the right question to ask, more to the point should be the question Whom do I ally myself with?